Dating on a Budget

First dates are like first impressions - you can't take it back. You should also know that where you take your date displays your personality. They don't expect you to take them somewhere you hate, after all. However, one of the biggest mistakes a lot of people make is that they overspend for dates and learn to regret it later. If you want to act like you make the big bucks to impress someone they are going to catch on eventually. There is only so far you can make that dollar stretch.

So, with that said, let's just say that it's the quality of the date that really matters. If you put some thought and effort into it then you don't have to worry about the cost as much. Your date will see how awesome you are, and you can still pay your rent or mortgage the next month.

Now, if you have been dating a while, then you know you can take your date to your apartment/house or bring something cool to do to theirs. But, if it's a first date I can pretty much guarantee that they won't want to go to your place. They really don't know you, and it would probably feel a bit awkward. Awkward is not a way to start your date.

So, let's be creative!

1. Most cities or towns have a "downtown" area that is rather trendy. In Wisconsin we have a lot of buildings that are rather cool looking too! So, why not make a first photo date? Most cell phones have a camera, but if yours doesn't then go pick up a cheap disposable camera at the corner store. Walgreens has a two pack for about ten bucks, but you could even get lucky and find them in a dollar store. Decide on what you want to take pictures of - like coolest places on the Ave or funkiest dressed people, or even most interesting decor or structures. You'll think of something.

This idea gives you time to talk too. And if you want dinner there are all kinds of places in a downtown that are reasonable. Gyros are a cheap and fun food. Depending on the time you start, though, your date doesn't have to include food at all. Just fun!

Plus, after the first date you can use the excuse of getting the film developed as a reason for a second date.

2.  There is also the idea of a picnic dinner at a park, but this can be trick in colder places and won't work in colder weather. Or will it? Suppose you pack a picnic that is travel safe. You have it in the car so that you can share it on the way to your destination. Make sure you make something small, non-messy, and edible. The edible part is very important. Of course, this kind of picnic you really want to forgo the wine. Even those airplane type bottles are a big no-no for driving. Play it safe and bring bottles of water or a drink you know your date is fond of.

So, where are you going? There are several ideas for destinations. You could go to a place you know with an open night mic. You could check out wine tastings in the area. Most of these run around $5 and some are even free. Plan this out ahead of time. All good dates take a bit of planning. It's all in the details. Check on the online calendar and see what's going on in your area. Most newspapers have an event calendar online, but don't just trust that... look around. Check out bulletin boards, online sites, or even see what kind of events you can find on Facebook. You might be surprised at your options.

3. Now here is an idea that is rather out of the box, but I think it could be lots of fun. Take your date shopping! I know, it's dating on a budget, just wait. Figure out how much money you are able to spend and divide it by two. Tell your date that you are going to shop for your date and then head to the dollar store. If you decided on $20 then give her $10 to spend. If you decided on $10 then give him $5 to spend. You get the idea.

Now, tell your date to go and buy something that they would like to use or do on your date. The dollar store even has food items! Tell them that you will take ten or twenty minutes to shop and you will meet them out front and compare your items. Then together you can create a fun and new way to use what the two of you bought together.

For instance, if your date bought a dollar movie then you can ask if they want to watch it at your place or theirs. If they bought a dog collar you can go to the animal shelter and donate it and take some time looking at the animals. If they bought a book, you could find a comfortable place to sit down and read it to one another. Or if they bought bird seed, go to the park for a walk and spread it out for the wildlife.

Your options are endless.

Hopefully this gives you some ideas where you realize you don't have to spend a fortune to have fun or to win over the heart of someone. You just have to be creative and be yourself. Life and love will be a lot less disappointing that way!

Worse Date Ever!

Everyone has been on bad dates. I mean, I have been on a date where the guy had zero money. He took me to the lake for a moonlight walk on the first date. I was okay with that. Dating isn't about how much money a guys spends. It's on the quality of what a good time you have. If a woman is going out with a guy just so he spends money on her - well, that's an entirely different topic.

The worse date I have ever experienced has to be where we went to see a scary movie. I didn't really want to go on this date in the first place, but the guy asked me and I didn't want to hurt his feelings. He was kind of an underdog. After this date, I think I figured out why.

We get into the movies and things are relatively normal. However, I was a bit thankful the movie was going to start soon. He constantly was talking about himself and all the wondrous glory that was him. How lucky I was that I accepted to be on a date with him. How intelligent he was. Everything that he thought I should know about him so that I didn't miss any detail. By this point, I wanted to miss all the details. I was polite, though. My mommy always said that I should smile and be polite even in the face of adversity. Believe me, I was feeling mighty adverse at this point.

I was thankful when the movie started. Although that was a short lived thankful moment. The guy was actually screeching in fear at the movie. Not the little "oh!" startled moment. Nope. He was actually competeing with the characters on the film who were on the verge of being maimed, murdered, and/or eaten alive.

I sunk a bit in my seat, hoping there was no one in the theater that would recognize me. I moved over in my seat about as far as the seat rails would allow. They don't make those seats nearly wide enough, by the way. My biggest fear at this time was that the guy would wind up in my lap.

Why take a girl to a spooky movie if you can't handle your scare? It's a question that may never be answered to my satisfaction.

You would think at this point that it would be the end of the worse night ever as he drove me home. One would hope, but one would be wrong.

As we pulled into the driveway of my house, after listening to his "Ode to Self" on the way home and how he completely puts himself into the movies he watches. (This I noticed. Unfortunately he was a survivor and not a victim, in this case.) I had reached my politeness breaking point.

He looks at me and tells me, "I'm going to let you kiss me now." I was astounded. Let me kiss him? He's lucky I didn't smack him upside the head and cause him more brain damage.

I simply replied with all the nice Southern Hospitality I could muster, "Don't do me any favors."

I got out of the car and walked away. There was never a second date.

The moral of the story is this: If you are on a very bad date, end it. Don't torture yourself or the other person with thinking they have a chance. Be kind, but honest. Simply say, "I'm sorry, but I'm really not having a good time and I think I am going to go home now. Thank you for meeting me."

In the meantime, how about sharing some of your own bad dating experiences? It could be fun and helpful to others!